Mar 06 2010

Bad dog back in lockup!

Filed under It's a Dawg's Life

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It’s me, Riley Pup. Oh boy, did I get in trouble! Mom and Pop usually leave me free in the house when they go somewhere, cause they said I earned my freedom being a good pup. When I was little, I only chewed up one remote control, munched on the carpet in the bedroom, and ate half of one of mom’s books (but I left her the chapters she hadn’t read yet). And I NEVER counter surf, or get in the trash, or poop or pee in the house …that’s just gross (well, ‘cept that one time that I was really sick and mom didn’t know I was at the door, but she didn’t get mad at me, so that doesn’t count).

So the other day, after I was stuck in this house for three days after it rained and rained and snowed and rained forever, I just lost it in my stir-craziness! After pop left me home alone, I chewed up one of pop’s seed catalogs and left bits and pieces over the office. I figured the kitties would get blamed, cause they are usually the ones that tear up paper around here. Then I got to thinking. Since mom’s been having problems with the cord and funny box to her lap top ‘puter, I decided that I would try and fix it for her. You know, to make up for leaving the paper everywhere in her office, ’cause I did feel a little guilty.

So I drug the cord and box thingy out from under table in between the couches. I figured that since she usually bounces the box around trying to get it to work, I would try a little remodeling work to see if I could chew it into submission. I chomped and gnawed on the box for a while. Then that got boring, cause there wasn’t enough chewy pleasure in that hard ole box. So I chewed the cord off of one end, bit the plug off, and then munched down some of the electric cord. I hear copper is a necessary mineral anyway. That meant fewer vitamins I would have to take, no?

Pop came home later and found what I had done. He only fussed at me a little, cause he said I knew what I had done was bad, and besides, it was his and mom’s fault for not exorcising my demons during all that rain, snow, and cold weather. Then he left again, and locked me back up in the bedroom in solitary confinement. Sure, the kitties come and go, but it’s just not the same. So when mom came home later and found me locked up behind baby gates in the bedroom with what she calls my guilty face (I don’t know what that means), I think she knew I was in some sort of serious trouble. Pop had left the ‘puter cord on the bar in the kitchen. So I got another fussing at from mom when she discovered what I had done. And you know what? She even threatened to take me to the VET to get my picture taken. Fortunately she wasn’t too mad. She said I was getting a good exorcism later. I REALLY like exorcisms, cause they involve lots of frisbee catching, ball chasing, and running across the field out behind the house. So I got an exorcism after I recovered from barfing up the pieces of the electric cord. Note to self….electric cord is really disgusting coming back out. Oh, and mom said she was really glad that the cord wasn’t plugged in, cause it could have fried me…whatever that means.

So the next day, I think cause she felt guilty that she got mad at me even though I was just trying to help fix that box thingy on the ‘puter cord, mom brought me a new bone. This one is really rubbery, kinda like the cord I so enjoyed chewing up. I overheard her tell pop that she hoped it gave me as much chewy pleasure as that old computer cord. I’m trying not to hurt her feelings, but I just don’t like it as much. So yeah, I got a new bone. But now I am grounded, stuck in solitary confinement in the bedroom when mom and pop aren’t home and I don’t get to go with them. Lockup really sucks!

3 responses so far

3 Responses to “Bad dog back in lockup!”

  1.   Wyatt Ray Dawgon 06 Mar 2010 at 4:53 pm     1

    Riley Dog, that’s an awesome way to get a new toy! I’m going to have to remember that one. When I ate the road flare I didn’t get anything but a scolding. Dang! I can learn a lot from you my friend.

    Ah, Sheppies. You gotta love us, right? Right?????

  2.   Wyatt Ray Dawgon 06 Mar 2010 at 5:15 pm     2

    Oh that Jerry, he’s always trying to steal my limelight.

    I wanted to let you know I couldn’t resist sharing your cool trick with my peeps:

  3.   bswitteron 06 Mar 2010 at 9:12 pm     3

    Dawg, I am glad you are helping to pass the word around about how humans are so easy sometimes! Anyway, us sherman gepherds gotta stick together!

    Hey, you know what I can’t figure out? Why mom is still laughing over you calling me Wiley Riley just like pop did sometimes when I was little…she says if the shoe fits. Oh, uh, no pun intended Wyatt Ray 😉 After all, our humans’ shoes do smell delish don’t they?